Saturday, June 18, 2005

Lunch with Mystic

It has been a while since I last met up with Mystic. After much contemplation on my end, we finally settled for lunch at Kenny Rogers'.

Mystic must have been extremely patient with me to bear with my indecisiveness in the choice of a lunch venue. So I'll thank her. I guess she must have been tolerating with my weird sense of humour throughout the time we had today too. I think she probably may not appreciate my sense of humour at all?

**
I am actually feeling a tinge of sadness today. That tinge of sadness started bugging me in the early afternoon.I do not know if this has any relation with what I had wrote in my previous post. If it has, it must have been unconsciously making me feel the sadness.

I suppose life simply has its pains which challenge us to find ways to strengthen ourselves against these pains?

**
Lunch was good. I have enjoyed Mystic's company and her friendship. I thank her for allowing me to talk about issues that could boost up my ego. I thank her for her presence and respectful companionship.

But I do realise I might not be doing her justice as a friend for I have much difficulties sharing with her my world and to let her gain some access to my sacred inner self. Yet, I guess for me today, it was just simply rather painful to share my world verbally. Even if it was any other day, verbalising that inner world of mine is a feat for me. I guess that is why I could end up being hard to be understood?

After lunch, Mystic was nice to lend me her company to get a birthday gift for one of my friends (but not the one mentioned in the previous post).

For me, I tried to go along with Mystic to window-shop in some of the shops of her interests, but I had probably failed miserably in my attempts. I had not much mood to shop actually. I could not make sense of that tinge of sadness in me. There seemed no reason for its presence. I could just cope by requesting to walk aimlessly about places. Walking often helps to soothe.

I was hoping that Mystic may not see through my act of vulnerability and question it. At the same time, I was hoping I could have done enough of the walking before Mystic and I have to part for the day, so that I don't have to face that bugging and unknown tinge of sadness alone.

**
The day is not one full of sadness actually. I heard one of my clients thank me for my work with her. I felt appreciated, and at the same time, I must say that she deserves a lot of credit too for moving to where she is now. In fact, she owe it all to herself. She reminded me that despite being vulnerable, we as human beings, do have the strength to deal with life's challenges and the pains that life may bring. I thank her for reminding me of this invaluable insight.

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